"Today
is a new day. Like every day before it. Each moment in time is
precious. Gone in an instant, never to return again. Hope springs from
the essence of existence. Forcing us to keep moving. Colors bring
light and life into the world, filling it with purpose that remains
unnamed, untouched but still fathomable. Beauty is not just in the eyes
of the beholder, but in the beholder’s perspective of beauty."
I wouldn't say I'm an optimist. I'm not a pessimist either (Though I have my moments). I usually accept things for what they are. There's no point in being happy about the junk in your life. But there's no point in complaining on and on and on about the inevitable. These past few months have been chaotic. A roller coaster ride that I'm still stuck on and will be stuck on for the foreseeable future.
High school is hard. Way harder than I ever thought it was going to be. I'm not even in actual High school either. I shudder to think what would've happened to me if I decided to go with my social instinct and go to the High school in our district. I don't think I would've survived the school year.
I guess you're all wondering how this all relates to the quote at the beginning of this post. That's a slightly long story. Well, first off, it's mine. I wrote it. Why did I write it? I'm actually working on a "project." I put quotes around the word "project" because that makes it seem like someone is making me do it or that it's really important. And it's really not. But in another way it is. I'm writing a piece based around the idea that within a year, a person can change in small ways until they're unrecognizable. Until they no longer know or understand the person they were 365 days ago. Nothing tremendously tragic happens to them. They merely live. They have their inner demons just like everyone else.
I'm writing this based off of personal experience. From not only what goes on in my mind, but what I've seen happened in people who are very close to me, people I know and other people who I've only heard about. I've been fighting my demons very hard lately. I will not succumb to them any time soon. But at the same time, maybe saying you won't fail or you won't lose, is the first step to falling. It's a long way down. This story tries to explain just how far down it really is. Once you hit rock bottom, you only have two choices left. I haven't decided which one I'll end my story with. This is my turning point. Oddly enough, I'm finding answers to the very questions that I'm writing. Hopefully the story will have a happy ending. Hopefully everything will be okay. Hopefully the scars won't hurt too much.
The excerpt above is from Day 1. I'm calling the piece "The Way We Fall." Hopefully I'll post some more of it very soon, but no promises.
Talk later,
Amy
